“Let there be spaces in your togetherness, And let the winds of the heavens dance between you. Love one another but make not a bond of love: Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls. Fill each other’s cup but drink not from one cup. Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf. Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone, Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music. Give your hearts, but not into each other’s keeping. For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts. And stand together, yet not too near together: For the pillars of the temple stand apart, And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other’s shadow.” ~ Khalil Gibran
Be together, but do not try to dominate, do not try to possess and do not destroy the individuality of the other. Love never suspects, love is never jealous. Love never interferes in the other’s freedom. Love never imposes on the other. Love gives freedom, and the freedom is possible only if there is space in your togetherness.
But let there be spaces in your togetherness… It is not contradictory. The more space you give to each other, the more you are together. The more you allow freedom to each other, the more intimate you are. Not intimate enemies, but intimate friends.
It is a fundamental law of existence that being together too much, leaving no space for freedom, destroys the flower of love. You have crushed it, you have not allowed it space to grow.
If this is possible – to have space and togetherness both – then the winds of heaven dance between you.
Love one another, but make not a bond of love. It should be a free gift, given or taken, but there should be no demand. Otherwise, very soon you are together but you are as apart as faraway stars. No understanding bridges you; you have not left the space even for the bridge.
Don’t make it something static. Don’t make it a routine. Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls. If freedom and love together can be yours, you don’t need anything more.
One has to be very, very alert. Stand together but without destroying the other. Not too much together – leave spaces.
Just look at the pillars. They stand apart but still they support the same roof. There is space, individuality, and yet there is a merger and meeting because they are supporting the same roof.
This much space is needed – that the other is not under your shadow. Otherwise, it will not grow.
Why are people who are in love constantly angry, sad? Because their own growth is not happening. One of the two has covered the whole sky and has not left even a little space for the sun, for the wind, for the rain to reach the other. It is not love, it is ownership, possessiveness.
Love would like you to grow at the same rate, to the same height, so that you dance together in the sun, in the wind, in the rain.
Your togetherness should be an art. Love is the greatest art in existence.